Monday, September 24, 2012

Eye doctors, ambulances, advice, and labels.

Tommy has had an eventful week.  Which means I had a eventful stressful week!

On Tuesday we saw the ophthalmologist.  The appointment went well, the ophthalmologist gave us a good report.  Tommy appears to use both eyes together- and that always gives me a glimmer of hope.  I still remember the day that Tommy had his cataract removed and the doctor could not guarantee he would ever be able to see out of that eye.  (Yay, it works!)  He said patching appears to be working- and continue to patch 4-6 hours per day (boo to patching!)  He said pressures "look good"  (they are 16 in bad eye and 13 in good eye).  He said- time to order glasses.  The news I've been hoping for and dreading for some time.  I'm hopeful that he will be able to see better, but somehow the glasses make all of this so real.  I know that doesn't make sense- we patch, we deal with contacts, all that is very real, but glasses seem like such a statement to the world.  It just makes my heart feel a little sad.
In the waiting room!


The real excitement has nothing to do with Tommy's eyes.  Tommy got the "back to school virus" and it hit him hard.  He woke up on Wednesday with a runny nose and terrible fussiness.  Me, being the good working mom that I am, gave him albuterol to fend off any breathing problems.  He was afebrile, but I fully planned on sending him to daycare.  His breathing wasn't BAD, just congested.  An hour later it wasn't better, so I gave him another dose (still no wheezing even with a stethoscope).  On my way to daycare, I decide that we should see the doctor that day- just in case- and because I knew our favorite doctor wasn't in the office the next day.  I get the first available appointment, which was in 2 hours.  Not enough time to go to work, but in plenty of time to go to Target!  (We needed a few last minute things for Tommy's sister's birthday).  We leave Target, get to the doctor a few minutes early, and Tommy has progressed to serious respiratory distress (grunting, breathing fast etc).  He gets a few treatments in the office, gets some oxygen, doesn't get better.
Doctor's office (poor baby)
The doctor is concerned enough to make us go to the ER... via ambulance.  Which may make one think that we were immediately whisked away to the hospital (~10 minute drive with traffic).  Ahhh, no.  The ambulance took 15-20 minutes to arrive, much to the doctor's dismay.  Next, the EMTs decide that Tommy needs a CARSEAT to ride to the hospital in.  (No disrespect to any EMT professionals, but, seriously?)  Ok, so we get to the ambulance, DRIVE to my car in the parking lot, 2 EMTs and a security guard attempt to get the seat out of my car.  Did I mention that all 3 of these guys were men in their 50s?  Yep, it was actually funny to watch them try to finagle it out.  They wouldn't let me let go of Tommy since he would scream.  It took them 10 minutes.  Then they couldn't figure out how to attach it to the stretcher.  Genius.  Tommy's dad, who missed my initial texts and was 20 minutes away, beat us to the hospital by a LONG shot.
Tommy strapped in a carseat and strapped to a stretcher.   (huh?)

I totally rock the monitor!
We finally get to the hospital, get admitted, and spend the night.
Sweet sleeping angel

I'm feeling better!
Poor Tommy.  We were discharged and have another new experience under our belts.
Hello Doctor?  Let me go home!!
I am outta here!!

I learned that I am really good at telling people what to do, how to take their medicine, why they need to etc etc etc.  But I am really bad about taking my own advice.  I know he needs medicine, I know why, I know how, I just don't want to.  (I am, don't worry, I am, just doing it reluctantly)

My problem with all of this- is that it is just another LABEL.  Tommy had a cataract.  Tommy wears a contact.  Tommy wears a patch.  Tommy wears glasses.  Tommy has asthma.

I don't want Tommy to be defined by any of these labels.  I don't want people to think of him as "that asthmatic kid with glasses and the small eye".  I don't want people to make judgements that people make when they see my baby.  I guess this is a good learning experience for me, too.  Judging is easy and often makes you feel better about your own situation.  But judging is never good- and is rarely reflective of the whole picture.

THIS is Tommy.

7 comments:

  1. I felt the same way when Easton got his glasses. On the outside I would say, what is a pair of glasses?! The kid already wears a contact and a patch! But on the inside, I was so sad it was just one more thing AND a forever "thing" at that.

    How crazy is your asthma experience?! I am sorry to hear of all of it. And you right, it is one more freaking thing. BUT anyone who isn't taking the time to see past that isn't worth his time or your tears.

    Tommy is Tommy and that is all there is to it! He is so much more than any of those labels. I don't even know him (kinda ;) and it's clear to me just in the photos he takes. He is full of life and I am sure anyone who gets the chance to see that in person would say that and MORE.

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    1. That is totally it! It is the forever thing with the glasses. The patching will end, the contacts, if we so choose, can end (with IOL). But glasses? They will always be there. Do Easton's glasses have the visible bi-focal line? I can't see them in pics. Tommy's will. That makes my heart even more sad. More visual cues to the rest of the world that he is different.

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    2. Right now his glasses are for the "good" eye so no bi-focal needed. But eventually he will wear his contact and a bi-focal lens full time for his "bad" eye... forever.

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  2. I love his little Sunday outfit and his infectious grin. He looks so mischievous. Might just be pictures, but it is so cute.

    I feel ya on the glasses thing. I totally get it. It is just ONE MORE thing I have to think about sticking on him. It is coming at this upcoming appointment, I just know it. I really hope it is an fairly easy transition for Tommy.

    Poor baby and mommy. Scary stuff. Seeing your kid having difficulty breathing is terrifying. Blake was diagnosed with asthma at the same age as Tommy. We took him to the chiropractor. I know that sounds strange. They don't "pop" their little backs. It is like a massage. He was off albuterol within a week. He also had serious GERD. He threw up all the time, which cleared up after the first week of appointments. It truly was a miracle turn around. I just thought I would share his experience. I know it is alternative therapy. If you have any questions, you can email me at missyadams@ymail.com.

    His little personality shines through in pictures. He is will be so much more than his diagnosis.

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  3. He is so stinking cute! I love his big ole smile and his little "man" clothes. The breathing thing is scary. I never know when it is ER type of breathing or when it is just give the the nebulizer type breathing. Glad you were able to get into the doc quick.

    And even though Julia doesn't have glasses (yet) I get the forever feeling. You are right, contacts may end and patches will end but the glasses will be permanent.

    But Tommy will always be Tommy (with or without glasses). And who knows, maybe the little frames will just make him even more adorable (I am sure they will).

    Anyways, I am so thankful for you and the other imoms that are a little bit ahead of me in the journey. I feel like I get a preview of what to expect. So thanks for sharing!

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  4. Wow, so cute! Our baby makes us smile!

    I heard that there are some people who are looking for good eye doctor for their problem in terms of poor eye sight and I want to share the best eye exam irmo sc.

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